Pressure and Expectations

      Pressure and Expectations

Ellie K

      I think the first time that I felt pressure or expectations were when I was in 5th grade while doing the 'explorer project.' This was my first big project, and I was still trying to figure out how to manage my time and work around soccer, basketball, etc. In the middle of this project, my parents had conveniently scheduled a vacation to Mexico. While I was in Mexico, I just sort of ignored my project. The due date loomed nearer and nearer, and I still hadn't done very much of the project. After getting back from Mexico and missing a week of school, I was in a pit. There was no way I was going to finish in time, so the day the project was due, I asked my teacher for an extension. She said no, that I had plenty of time to do the project, and that it was my responsibility to manage my time better next time. I turned my project in a couple days late, and got a C+. I still passed, but I was really disappointed with my grade. I came home crying, and very sad.
      Looking back on this project, I think this is the first time I had realized that I had expectations for myself. I had always done everything well, and this is the first time that I had done badly on a project. This was the first time that I was disappointed in myself.
     I think that we can all relate to this feeling of letting one's self down, or feeling that we have let someone else down. In middle school especially, we start to feel pressure to do well from ourselves, teachers, parents, and even our own classmates and peers. We feel like we need to do well to impress someone, or to maintain a reputation. We feel like others are expecting us to ace a test, or be the star of the soccer team. Whether it's sports or school, we all have expectations to live up to, and feel pressure from others and ourselves, and we have to learn how to manage these expectations and pressure.
      I have learned that when I do feel pressure, I haven't managed my time well. I have a lot of activities afterschool. I do lots of sports, and don't have much free time from getting done with basketball practice and then zipping off to soccer for 2 hours. When I do feel pressure, it's usually from me. I am very hard on myself, and push myself to do well. If /when I feel pressure to do well from other people, it's usually from my parents, especially my dad. My dad wants me to do well, and to have lots of options for when I'm older. He and I are a lot alike, in terms of pushing ourselves and always wanting to do better.

Lolo Jones, a great athlete who didn't do well in a race and received lots of criticism for not doing well.
http://i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/archive/02227/JONESREX2_2227816b.jpg

      Sometimes it's hard to balance the expectations of your parents and your own expectations. I think this is hard for me because my dad pushes me hard to do well. He always wants me to do better, and push myself harder, but sometimes that's too much, and I have to stand up to myself and say that I'm doing well and trying hard.
     Along with pressure come expectations, and pressure can come from high or unreasonable expectations. We experience pressure from ourselves, parents, and peers. Pressure is a normal thing to feel, but there is a point that we need to realize that sometimes we are pushing someone else too far, or have unreasonably high expectations. Pressure can be a good thing, but pressure can make us realize how hard we are willing to work, and how far we will go to live up to the expectations of others.